It was October, and the Indians on a remote reservation asked their new Chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. He had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn’t tell what the winter was going to be like. To be on the safe [...]

[Read more →]

A pirate wearing two gorgeous hoop earnings walks into a tavern. All the other pirates marvel and exclaim their jealousy. One of them asks, “How much did ye pay fer them?”
The marvelous pirate responds, “Arrr!! It twer a buck an ear…”
Related PostsA Pirate Walked Into A BarA pirate walked into a bar and the [...]

[Read more →]

Two blondes were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they’d never seen before. Each bought one.The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, she [...]

[Read more →]

Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold [...]

[Read more →]

Descartes walks into a restaurant and orders a cup of coffee. He sits for a while, drinking his coffee and reading the paper.
A little while later, the waitress comes by and asks him if he would like another cup. He says “I think not,” and promptly disappears.
Related PostsIndian, Buffalo, and CoffeeAn Indian walks into [...]

[Read more →]

A carload of hunters, looking for a place to hunt, pulled into a farmers yard. The driver went up to the farmhouse to ask permission to hunt. The old farmer said, “Sure you can hunt, but maybe you can do me a favor? That old mule standing over there is 20 years old and sick [...]

[Read more →]

Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: No eye deer.
Q: What do you call a deer with no legs and no eyes?
A: Still no eye deer.
Related PostsGeorgia HuntersA group of Georgia friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of …Fish With No EyesQ. [...]

[Read more →]

Two cows are standing in a pasture.
The first cow says, “Have you heard about this new mad cow disease?”
The second cow says, “I don’t care, I’m a helicopter!”
Related PostsTwo Cow GovernmentSOCIALISM: You have two cows. The State takes one cow and gives it to someone else.

COMMUNISM: Yo…Happy Birthday Stan Laurel!Arthur Stanley Jefferson, who after [...]

[Read more →]

Q. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A. Fsh
Related PostsDeer With No EyesQ: What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A: No eye deer.

Q: What do you call a deer with no le…Did Noah Fish?A Sunday School teacher asked Johnny, “Do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he [...]

[Read more →]

It’s old, but still amusing.
Lady Astor: “Winston, if I were your wife I’d put poison in your coffee.”
Winston: “Nancy, if I were your husband I’d drink it.”
The quote is apparently authentic, and came after days of prolonged arguments between Lady Astor and Churchill.
Related PostsQuotes About GovernmentChurchill, Reagan, Twain, Voltaire, and More

They all have something [...]

[Read more →]